A Hell worth Living
by nightwing147
Summary: Set after season three. Dean's fresh out of hell and Sam's sinking further into the darkness. The brothers have secrets they aren't willing to share. But secrets have a price. Especially when Dean's old Master will do anything to bring his boy back to the pit. Rating may change.
1. Chapter 1

**Hey guys. So this fic is set just after the finale of season 3. I don't know where it's going exactly but what I do know is, is that it is Dean centric and it will be full of angst and the supernatural – obviously! So sit back and relax. And please review. Oh and I'm doing this for no profit, please don't sue me. All rights belong to the CW channel etc.**

**Oh and it will be dark, so you have been warned!**

Chapter 1

_There was blood. Lots of it. Like a river. Running down his cheeks like freshly fallen tears. He was melting in it. He practically bathed in it. He laughed as he cut into helpless soul before him, screaming at him to stop. He just smiled and continued carving._

_And then there he was. His Master. He was always there. Always watching him. Touching him. Owning him. Saying that he belonged to him. Belonged to him for eternity. And then there was a light. A light so bright that it filled all of Hell's dark corners. A light so powerful it sent his Master cowering into the shadows. If his Master was scared…he cried out in fear as the light surged toward him. Like a tidal wave. He screamed. He screamed for his Master to save him. _

Dean gagged as he inhaled the dry air. His eyes snapped open. Oh God. He couldn't see anything. Spasms cascaded down his side as he felt his surroundings. His sweaty fingers bumped into a piece of wood. He was trapped. His heart lurched in his chest as the full force of the truth crashed upon him like a ton of bricks. He was trapped in his own grave.

"Help!"

His voice sounded like a zombie. He almost laughed at the pun. He _should _be a freaking zombie. Heck he should still be with…

A chill ghosted down his spine. No. He thought. Those days of being someone's bitch were over. There was only one explanation for this.

Sam.

Oh God. He had to get out of here.

"Someone… help!" He croaked, gagging as he spoke he decided shouting was worthless. His throat was on fire. He needed to concentrate on getting himself out. Or he'll die again. Yippee. Dean thought. Probably broken a few world records here. I'll be taking them trophies home now.

Home. Dean snorted as he tried to shove the flimsy wood above him apart. Home is where Sam is. And he needed to get up there. He needed to see Sammy. Tell him what a sorry dick he was for saving him.

Dean smirked as clumps of dirt crumbled down his back. Taking a deep breathe he pushed the wood and almost grinned with relief when shards of light pierced his eyes. His hands trembled as he shoved more dirt into his makeshift coffin. He was going to make it.

Dean gasped as blessed fresh air caressed his face. His mouth opened and closed like a codfish. Using the remaining energy he had he dragged his sore frame out of the dark hole. Out of the pit forever. And for a split second, he wasn't mad at Sammy for making the deal. Because he was free. Free at last. His Master couldn't hurt him up here….no demon bitch can ever hurt him again.

**This is a shot preview. Chapters will hopefully be longer but updates will be slow as I am working on another fanfic currently but also I have tons of work to do and I'll only continue if there are reviews, u guys have been warned! Thanks for reading! **


	2. Chapter 2

**Hey all! Since my mocks are over I thought I'd celebrate by writing a bit of fanfiction. Thanks for the reviews and follows, I appreciate it. So I have decided to continue the story as there's sort of a plot in my head. I'd love more reviews please! Each one makes my day! **

**I wouldn't be writing this fic if the rights belonged to me! **

**P.S. Be prepared, it will only get darker from here, although I'm planning to bring Cas in soon and then we'll have some laughs, and perhaps a little bromance if u guys review! **

Chapter 2

Dean sighed contentedly as he bit into the cheeseburger. Oh my God. If there was one thing he really missed when he was in Hell, besides Sam and Bobby, it was junk food. He grinned at Bobby, who was sitting opposite him in the diner, the old man's face smiled sadly back at him. Dean frowned, placing his burger on the plate, he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand before saying,

"C'mon Bobby I don't need your sympathy crap."

"Watch your tone with me, boy." Bobby's mouth thinned as Dean chomped on a handful of fries. "You went to freaking _Hell_, it isn't exactly sunshine and daisies. It's the pit."

In a matter of seconds Dean's green eyes darkened in the brightly lit diner. Bobby swallowed nervously as the Winchester glared at the older hunter.

"I already told you, I don't remember a thing. So cut the crap."

"Okay." Bobby raised his hands defensively, "Thank God you don't remember, eh? It would certainly give you nightmares."

Dean nodded nervously. His hands trembled as he picked up a few fries, "Yeah. Thank God."

His stomach curled as flashes of blood and guts flickered within his mind. He could almost feel the barbed chains of the rack pierce into his flesh. He could almost feel his Master's sadistic soul pressing against his own broken one. He gulped as he picked up the cheeseburger, nibbling on the beef mince, the blood red juices trickled down his chin. Dean's eyes almost widened in fear as the smell suddenly reached his nostrils for the first time. Bobby frowned as Dean choked on the burger, shoving the plate aside like trash. He wasn't hungry anymore.

"Dean, are you okay?" Bobby's eyes shimmered with concern for the young man before him, who was like the son he never had. The poor boy had been through so much. Seen so much that no one _should _ever see. He went to freaking _Hell. _No one's been raised from the pit before. Bobby shook his head sadly, Dean was different. And no amount of bravado he pulled could hide the fact that his boy was shattered on the inside. The only annoying thing was that the idjit was too damned proud to let Bobby help him.

Dean blinked rapidly, as though shoving whatever thoughts were bothering him to somewhere deep in the back of his mind. And a second later, the old Dean was back. The young man cast a cocky grin in his elder's direction. Bobby sighed. Just like his father. Always burdened with his own problems rather than sharing them.

"Yeah." He grinned, "I'm fine. Just nervous about seeing Sammy is all."

"Well, son, why don't you finish your burger and then we'll get a pie to go." Bobby pressed. Dean's eyes flickered nervously to his plate. The lad shook his head. "Nah, I'm done with the burger, now pie…" His eyes shone greedily and a little drool began to form on the edge of his lip. "I'm up for pie. Make it a double, no a triple with extra ice cream."

"You got it, boy. Go ahead and order it and I'll see you in the truck, then we'll get Sam."

Dean grinned as Bobby stood up and patted his shoulder once before thanking the waitress and shuffling out of the diner.

Dean suddenly released a deep breath that he never realised he'd been holding. His sweaty hands shook as he picked up his bear, sighing as the refreshing liquid caressed his sore throat. Why did Bobby have to be so damn assertive? It was like having a freaking guardian angel perched on his shoulder. Bobby meant well but sometimes he didn't know when to shut the hell up.

"Can I get you anything, sir?" Dean looked up to see a skinny waitress lean casually over his table. In that position so he could see her well defined breasts protruding out from her chest. He grinned, now this was another thing he missed whilst in the pit. Chicks.

"Can I get three slices of apple pie to go, make sure they are extra-large slices, and an extra-large portion of ice-cream, all three flavours?"

"Is this your last supper or something?" The waitress smirked as Dean smiled sheepishly back.

"More like my first. I was out of town for a while, I missed your pies." Dean winked. But instead of blushing nervously like they usually do, this chick was different. She leaned forward until their heads were almost touching. Alarm bells were blaring in Dean's brain as he felt her breath tickle the back of his neck. Her voice was so low, so quiet, that Dean almost missed the damning words he heard next. "Welcome back Dean-o. I have an order for _you_ from downstairs." The hunter froze. His blood pounded in his ears and his mind screamed at him to run, but he couldn't. Fear kept him planted on his seat. "Your Master says that you shouldn't get too comfortable. He's coming for you Dean, and this time, you'll stay in the pit for good."

She drew away slightly, and Dean's terrified orbs stared straight into her black ones. And for moment… or was it his imagination? But Dean could have sworn he heard laughter, a deep chilling laughter that was all too familiar… and it wasn't coming from the demon before him… but inside his mind.

"Forget the pie." Dean croaked.

He could hear her laughter as he stumbled out of the booth he had been sitting in. Her laughter reminded Dean of _him. _Of the cold laughter inside his head.

"_You can't run. I own you."_

Dean's knees almost buckled as he heard his Master's sultry voice in his mind, or was it coming from the waitress or from the diner. In any case, he needed to get out of there. Knocking into a few bewildered customers on the way out, he shoved the door open with a loud clang.

"_There's someone here who wants to be reunited with you Dean. Come back to the pit so you two can get back together again."_

Dean blinked back tears as he took long, hurried strides towards the truck. Running would only make Bobby even more suspicious. And when he looked up he could see Bobby's concerned expression as he slid into the seat next to him, shutting the door of the truck with a loud bang that made both of them jump.

"What about the pie?" Bobby asked curiously.

Dean's knuckles turned white with frustration and he growled, "Just drive." through two rows of gritted teeth.

"_Tick tock Dean-o. Our happy family will be reunited shortly. Daddy's coming, boy. Daddy's coming."_

Dean felt like sobbing there and then. He was never going to be free. He was never going to be free from _him_…

Bobby gripped the steering wheel in frustration as Dean stared blankly into the distance, battling his own demons by himself, not letting anyone else in. Damned Winchesters. Whatever spooked the kid in that diner, Bobby was sure as hell going to kill the damned thing. No one will hurt the boys on his watch. No… no one's going to hurt _his_ boys. _I promise you John_. He thought, _I'll protect them even if I die trying in the process. Just as I've always done._

Bobby could almost see John nodding his approval in his grave.

**So what do you guys think? I feel so mean hurting Dean like this, but don't worry the brothers are finally going to be reunited next chapter! And of course Cas is going to join us shortly. Please review! **


	3. Chapter 3

**So here's the next chappie of A Hell Worth Living. The brothers are finally going to be reunited! Woohoo! Let's see if Sammy will notice any changes in Dean, or is it just Bobby who's the only perceptive character.**

**As always Supernatural isn't mine *sob*, for if it was I'd get to work with Jensen Ackles every single day, but I haven't even met him so… yeah Supernatural's not mine. Anyways, digressing here a bit, enjoy! **

Chapter 3

Sammy.

He was about to see Sammy again.

After all this time.

"You okay, boy?" Bobby asked quietly, noticing Dean's slightly paler complexion. Dean nodded hastily. And knocked on the door.

What Dean did not expect to see, was a cute chick, who was practically naked, standing in the doorway. He raised an eyebrow, did his bro have a gender change whilst he was in the pit?

"So where is it?" The girl asked abruptly. Dean growled. So much for the good welcome home. The girl looked like she wanted to drag him back to the pit herself.

Dean and Bobby shared an awkward glance before Dean muttered, "Where's what?"

The girl snorted, "The pizza?" She said it as if it were the most obvious thing in the world. Dean really did not like her attitude. He cracked his knuckles in frustration.

"Look, we…"

"Dean." A surprisingly small voice sounded from his towering "6"4 baby brother. Dean squinted into the dimly lit room as Sam's hulking mass stumbled forward. Oh God. Dean's heart constricted. Sammy. Sam's hazel eyes glowed with a faint hope for a brief second, and then, to Dean's surprise, the kid lunged towards him. His eyes blazing with fury.

"What are you, what have you done you son of a bitch!" He yelled. The girl cautiously backed towards the wall away from the violent punches Sam attempted to throw at Dean. However, good old Bobby made sure that Sam never actually hit his brother.

"Sam." Bobby's voice was almost as firm as their old man's. "Sam, I did the drill before, it's him. It's really him."

Tears glistened in Sam's eyes as the confusion and anger in his hazel orbs melted into happiness.

"Dean." Sam choked, and instead of coming at him with fists, Sam enveloped his brother into a massive bear hug. Dean returned the hug, a few tears threatening to escape his own eyes. God. He had truly never been so happy before. It was like Christmas, Easter and birthdays wrapped up into one. He was home.

"What did you do? Goddamit Sam, what did you do?" Dean mumbled as they broke apart.

Sam was about to reply when they were interrupted by a sharp cough. The girl stared at them with confusion, and there was even a tinge of horror in her expression.

"So are you two… together?" She asked stiffly.

Stuck up bitch. Dean thought savagely. But the hunter kept his lips shut, not wanting to ruin this moment with Sam.

Sam's eyes widened and his cheeks coloured with slight embarrassment.

"No. Er no, he's my brother."

Now it was the girl's turn to raise an eyebrow, apparently she needed more convincing. What was it with people in thinking they were gay?

"Oh, er, I guess I should be going."

Yeah, you should. Dean smirked. Although he had to admit, she was kinda hot. A bit short and skimpy for his tastes, but he wasn't gonna lie, Sammy would have had a fun night if it weren't for him.

"Yeah." Sam bit his lip awkwardly. "Bye Karen."

"It's Kristy." She said sharply.

Sam smiled sheepishly, flashing his infamous puppy eyes that made most chicks swoon. God his baby brother could be cute when he wanted to be. Dean paused suddenly, replaying that thought in his head. Now it was _his _turn to blush as the girl grabbed her belongs and walked out of the room, shutting the door behind her.

Once the girl had left, instead of telling Sam how pleased he was to see him again, Dean did the usual Winchester thing. And got straight to the point.

"Sam." He said, almost viciously. Sam widened his eyes in surprise. "Sam what did you do? Who did you make a deal with? How long have they given you? For God's sake Sammy, why? I went to Hell to save your ass!"

Sam stood perplexed for a minute or two. Walking over towards the bed he sat down, the springs in the shabby motel bed creaked like the hinges of a rotten door. Sam sighed wearily. "I didn't. Man I wish I could have, but every crossroads demon turned me down. I haven't made a deal!"

Now _that _was not the answer Dean had been expecting. He stared at his brother, observing his expression closely in an attempt to discover any hidden truths. But from what he could see, his brother was telling him the truth. He didn't make a deal. Dean didn't know what to feel. On one hand he was glad Sam hadn't sold his soul for him… but another selfish part of him felt differently.

"Uh huh." Dean sat down on the bed next to Sam.

Bobby cleared his throat awkwardly. "This is good then, boy, surely we must be celebrating. No deals were made. Maybe there is someone looking after you after all?"

Dean snorted, "What like God?"

"Well, I'm not exactly the religious type…"

"Well you shouldn't be." Dean growled, "You know full well that Bible crap doesn't exist."

'_Someone's in denial.'_

Dean froze. Luckily he managed to keep a cool face for Sam and Bobby, but inside his soul was practically trembling with fear. That voice. That cold, sultry voice of his Master just sounded inside his damn head.

"Are you alright, boy?"

Dean almost jumped as Bobby laid a fatherly hand on his shoulder. Dean shrugged it off. Casting them a cocky grin.

"Why wouldn't I be?" He grinned.

Sam snorted in reply.

"Shut up Sammy." Dean smirked, "Now who's up for pie?"

"Well a pizza is on its way." Sam replied.

Dean's stomach crumbled as he pictured the slimy processed cheese dribbling from the surface of a layer of tomato sauce, accompanied by the crunch of white crusty dough. Mmmm.

"Dean, you're drooling again." Sam smiled wearily, "Guess you weren't living the high life in Hell, huh?"

Dean's eyes widened ever so slightly for a fraction of a second, although Sam failed to notice this for Dean cast his brother his widest grin. "'Course not dummy, what do expect? 'Sides, barely remember a thing! I'll grab some pie from the store. Can't have pizza without pie."

Sam rolled his eyes. "You can't have _anything _without pie."

Dean shrugged, "Well men who don't like pies are wussies, guess that includes you, Sammy. Want anything Bobby?"

Bobby shook his head, eyeing Dean as the hunter strode toward the door. "Nah, boy, you treat yourself to whatever you want."

Dean grinned sheepishly. "Oh believe you me, I will."

Sam smirked as Dean shut the door behind him. It was unbelievable. Dean. Back from Hell. Without him having made a deal. It was as though God had actually answered his prayers. But he was still going to kill that demon bitch Lilith. Dean still needed vengeance.

"Something seem off about him, Sam?" Bobby questioned, his eyes were still planted firmly on the door Dean had just left by.

"Well, the dude has just come back from Hell, Bobby, what do you expect?" Sam cast a worried glance in the direction of the elder hunter.

Bobby sighed. "I dunno, Sam. He got real spooked earlier today in a diner, I mean, the kid looked like he wanted to cry. I know Dean as well as I know you, and that's real well, boy. The kid may act all tough and all, but something's definitely up."

"Post-traumatic distress?" Sam suggested. "Maybe he can remember Hell?"

Bobby nodded. "My thoughts exactly."

But what the two hunters didn't know is that it was not what Dean remembered from Hell that truly bothered him… it was what was coming after him… in his dreams… and in his thoughts. His Master was about to visit topside in order to drag his student back down to the pit. And his Master _never _visited topside unless he really wanted something. And in these circumstances Sam and Bobby will not be able to help him, not this time. But maybe someone else can…?

**Bet you guys can't guess what the someone else is! I won't give you any clues cos it'll be really obvious… that's probably given him away too! Anyways I hope you guys enjoyed that chapter. I don't know when my next update will be as I am really busy but I'll try and make it as quick as possible. That is only if you guys review! Thanks everyone! x**


	4. Chapter 4

**Hey guys! Thanks for all your reviews and follows so far. Guess who's popping up in this chapter. Superchiwo, your wish is my command. And Captain Monster Masher, thank you for your comment about my writing. I appreciate it! And thanks to the other reviewers, particularly Swisspie who has reviewed twice. You guys make my day brighter, and I posted another chapter early just for you! **

**No rights belong to me. *sigh***

**Enjoy! **

Chapter 4

"Dude, you're like a freaking cow." Sam shook his head as his brother tore at his slice of pizza like a carnivore strips its prey's flesh from its bones.

Dean sighed as the cheese and tomato melted in his mouth. "Sammy." He said softly, "Just shut up. I'm making love to my pizza right now."

"Get a room, man. You have the same table manners as a three year old."

Dean snorted, ignoring his brother he whispered. "If I ever go back in time. The last week of my life should have been spent eating pizza instead."

"You'd have probably died from all the cholesterol." Sam smirked as Dean shrugged.

"Better than getting ripped apart by hellhounds."

And just like that the temperature seemed to drop a few degrees. As though a ghost had just walked into the room. Dean continued chewing awkwardly on his pizza, occasionally glancing at his brother, whose expression was unreadable.

"Dean, do you remember any…?"

"Being chewed apart by hellhounds, hell yeah." Dean smiled grimly, "And I tell you, that memory is top of the most painful list."

Sam swallowed nervously.

"Relax Sammy, I already told Bobby, I don't remember Hell. I remember being a dog's chew toy, the next thing I know, I'm stuck in my own grave. Oh yeah, next time you bury me, make sure it's comfy. Instead of a box, maybe add a few cushions."

"Sure thing Dean." Sam murmured.

Bobby smiled thinly at the exchange. Everything was wrong. Nothing would be back to the way it was. Dean was different. Sam was different. Everything was different. Bobby sighed loudly. Dean raised an eyebrow.

"Bloody hell, Bobby, didn't realise you were still there." Dean cracked the elder hunter a grin.

"Good one, boy." Bobby stood up, stretching his cramped muscles. "Well, I'm glad you're okay Dean. I'll be heading off, I suppose I have nothing better to do with my life than to find out what pulled your ass outta Hell."

Dean grinned, "Thanks Bobby."

Sam nodded, "Yeah, thanks man."

Bobby smiled grimly, "Now don't you two idjits go getting yourself into trouble again, you hear me? Not until I find out what we're dealing with."

"Yes, sir." The boys chorused. Bobby shook his head, "Idjits." He muttered quietly, before shutting the door behind him.

"Sam." Dean said softly.

"Yeah, what's up?" Sam answer, lines of concern creasing his forehead.

"I tell you I'm gonna hunt this son of a bitch. I don't care if it dragged me outta Hell. _No _supernatural crap hands out free candy like that. Next time I hear a foghorn screaming in my ear, I'll be ready."

Sam sighed, running a hand over his face in frustration. "Dude, please, you _just _returned from the dead. Can't we at least celebrate?"

Dean sighed. "Fine, but I'm telling you, tomorrow I'm gonna hunt this thing. Bobby said he knows this psychic chick, Pamela. Maybe she'll help me out?"

Sam patted his brother's shoulder. "Shut up and eat your pie Dean."

Dean grinned. "I love it when you get all bossy."

Sam shook his head in response. No matter what the occasion, Dean will still be Dean. An annoying jerk that just wouldn't quit.

* * *

Poor Pamela.

Poor freaking Pamela.

Why? Was it him? Did God enjoy making his life an absolute bitch? Dean smiled grimly as Bobby drew the last of the wards that would protect them from those evil sons of bitches. Everyone he had ever come to contact with he had lost. Mum. Dad. Sam. He didn't know what was going on with that kid. But he knew something had changed. He could see it in his eyes.

He sighed as he listened to Bobby muttering some ancient spell.

"Now we wait." Dean said as he cocked his gun filled of rock salt.

Bobby nodded. "Now we wait."

Last year Dean would have given anything for more time.

Time was a freaking bitch.

They'd been waiting for hours. So long that Dean felt his bum turn numb on the seat he was perched on. Dean eyed all of the wards one last time. Maybe they shouldn't have put so many? I mean if they wanted to kill the thing…it could have sensed them. He glanced upwards, yep no glass so no chance of getting pierced to death. Dean sighed dramatically.

"Are you sure you did the spell right?"

If looks could kill, this one would have sent Dean straight back to Hell. Dean shivered, even thinking about the pit made his stomach churn.

'_Are you sure you aren't just thinking of me? Miss me?'_

Dean bit back the urge to scream.

"Oh come on." He growled, "Show yourself you son of a bitch." The voice wasn't _him. _The voice was caused by his own anxiety. Yep. Dean almost laughed. He was officially insane.

"Boy?" Bobby said nervously. Oh crap. Dean thought.

"Hey, look man I'm not crazy…"

"Boy!" Bobby shouted.

Dean looked up. The light had just blacked out, like a candle in the wind. Followed by the other two. Dean prepared his shot. He was going to kill this bastard.

Dean almost dropped his gun a sound so piercing scraped his eardrums. Both he and Bobby cringed as the sound grew louder in pitch, their eardrums felt like they were going to explode. Dean's pulse quickened as the wooden panes of the ceiling bashed against the rafters like a thousand drums.

Suddenly the doors of the shack flew open and a man walked into the building. Dean and Bobby fired their shots like there was no tomorrow. Pamela. Dean thought viciously. Must yank this bitch for Pamela. But the thing continued walking towards them as though the many bullets he had been struck with were nothing more than tiny prods.

'_That thing is dangerous, Dean-o. Don't worry, I'll come and save you.'_

Dean felt like sobbing as his Master's voice rang loud and clear in his head.

He was so preoccupied with his thoughts that he didn't see Bobby fall to the floor unconscious. Dean's eyes widened in horror. No. Bobby. "No!" He shouted. The hunter continued firing at the thing. _Click. Click_. Dean gulped. He had just run out of bullets and the creature was only a metre in front of him. Talk about personal space.

Dean gulped. "Go ahead. Kill me."

The man, or the thing wearing the man, frowned. "Why would I save you and then kill you?" Its voice was slow, deep but it lacked the sly undertones a demon always possessed. Dean snarled.

"Oh you guys probably have a thing for killing me over and over again. What's stopping you? Do it!"

The creature sighed. "No…You don't think you deserve to be saved. Dean Winchester. You do deserve to be saved. Good things do happen."

Dean's breathed hitched in his throat. The thing just said his name. His palms began to sweat as the creatures bright blue eyes bore into his green ones. "Not in my experience." Dean sneered.

The creature's eyes darkened slightly. Dean almost flinched. "Dean Winchester." He said sternly, "I was the one who grabbed you and raised you from perdition."

Dean snorted. "So, who are you?"

"Castiel." The being said simply.

Dean felt like biting the ruddy bitch's head off. "I figured that out that much." He growled, "I mean what are you?"

The being's eyes darkened further at the mention of his name. "I am an angel of the Lord."

If Dean wasn't so freaked out, he would have laughed his freaking head off.

"Angel. There's no such thing." Dean snapped.

The so-called angel's eyes changed from their previous dark expression to something which resembled sympathy. The being stared directly into Dean's eyes, his stare was so intense that Dean felt his will buckle.

'_Don't worry boy, I'm coming, I'll save you_.'

Dean felt like sobbing.

"You have no faith." The thing stated. And then the lights flickered. Lightning flashed. And Dean gasped in amazement as two dark wings filled the room like terrifyingly beautiful shadows. Dean, plucking the remainder of his dying courage he glared at the being.

"Well some angel you are." He growled, thinking of Pamela. "You burned out that poor woman's eyes."

The thing sighed. "I warned her not to spy on me. My true form can be overwhelming to humans, and my true voice, but you already know that."

Dean felt like punching the guy right there. "So the gas station and the motel. That was you talking?"

The so-called angel nodded.

"Buddy, next time lower the volume." Dean warned.

"It was my mistake." The being sighed, "Certain people, special people, can perceive my true image. I thought you would be one of them. I was wrong."

Dean scowled. "And what visage are you now? Holy tax accountant?"

The supposed angel glanced down at his meatsuit. Ruffling his coat he grinned to himself, as though proud of a recent achievement. "This…no this is a vessel."

Dean glared at the "angel", incredulous. "You're possessing some poor bastard!"

"Oh he's actually a devout man, he prayed for this."

Dean glared at him in reply. He still couldn't shake off the feeling that there was a reason his Master was scared of this thing. If his Master was scared… then how powerful was this Castiel. Was it really an angel? Dean learnt from his old man that he should never trust what any supernatural crap said.

"So why did you save me?" Dean asked through gritted teeth. Staring into the being's coral blue eyes.

Castiel stared fiercely at the Winchester. "Because God commanded it."

Oh crap. Dean felt a lump form in his throat. So God his freaking real. No he thought savagely, the thing's playing you.

'_Don't worry son, I'll save you.'_

Dean felt his insides breaking. Shut up! He yelled in his thoughts.

"Because we have work for you." Castiel said firmly.

Dean felt like ramming the angel's head up his ass. Of course God wouldn't save him out of the goodness of his heart. Meeting an angel was now second in his list of his top ten most painful moments. Because the thing just ruined his tiny smidgen of freedom. Fan freaking tastic.

**There you go. Cas has finally joined the boys. Don't worry Dean's going to warm up to him eventually. Sorry if there are typos, there are bound to be many. As always thanks for reading and please review! I need more! Reviews to me are like what pie is to Dean. They make me write! Thanks guys! **


	5. Chapter 5

**After mocks I have surprising amounts of free time. So I thought I'd write another quick update. Thanks everyone for all your support with this fic. Remember the faster you guys review, the quicker I will post. Warning, this chapter is dark! Do not read if you don't want to. You have been warned…**

**Again, no rights belong to me etc. etc. etc.**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 5

Before Dean went to Hell he used to sleep like a baby. No nightmares. No apocalyptic visions. No nasty memories… okay maybe a couple of bad memories, but nothing that would make him lie awake for hours trying to keep his eyes open. Dean glanced at his little brother, eyeing Sammy with such jealousy for a moment he blamed Sam for his misery. I mean, it was Sam's fault he failed to kill Jake and therefore lost himself to Death's embrace. The fact that Sam had even been born… I mean, it was his fault their mother had…

NO! Dean clasped his hands over his ears. Horrified at the thoughts that were flying through his tired brain. No. He couldn't think like that. Sam was everything to him. How could he blame Sam for everything? It was the Yellow Eyed Demon's fault they were in this mess. Not Sammy.

Dean felt a tear trickle down his cheek. He furiously wiped the drop away and glanced at the alarm clock. 3 am. A couple of hours and he would be up at his usual time anyway. Dean sighed as he lugged his body out of the shabby bed. So much for sleep. He stumbled like a drunkard to the kitchen fridge where he fumbled around for a bear. He grinned as he gulped the cool liquid. Drowning his sorrows away. He then made his way to the small table in the kitchen and sat on one of the chairs. He folded his arms and lay his head on the cool surface. Dean grimaced. This was what Hell had reduced him to? A quivering alcohol-addicted insomnia?

'_Sleep…'_

That voice. That fucking voice. Dean took another tired gulp. How could he still here is Master. No. Dean thought viciously. _Ex-Master. _He was no longer someone's bitch.

'_We both know that's not true. Now sleep…'_

Dean suddenly felt his eyelids double in weight. They began to droop. Dean shook his head, slapping himself sharply on the cheek. Stay awake. He thought fiercely. Stay awake. S…stay…

Dean dropped the bear bottle onto the carpet, the liquid trickled out like the way blood flows from a wound. Dean's eyes finally closed and the nightmare began.

_Dean whirled around. Where was he? How? He…_

_Dean breathed in once deeply and let it out sharply. He needed to focus. Someone was controlling his sleep. Someone was still controlling him. He looked around. He was in a white room. It was blindingly white. He hissed as the light pierced his sore eyes. He tried to move._

_He couldn't. _

_His hands and feet were tied down._

_Panic surged within him like a tidal wave. He had to get out now. _

_He desperately tugged on his straps, as frantic as a wild animal trying to escape the clutches of confinement. _

_This was a very familiar situation…_

_Then there was a high, cold laugh that sent goosebumps crawling up Dean's spine._

_That was a very familiar laugh…_

_Then there was a man looming over him. But Dean could see past the pristine and slightly plump meatsuit. He could see the terrifyingly true form of his Master. His white eyes gleaming like two poisoned moons. _

"_Hi there, Dean-o. Miss me?"_

_Dean couldn't speak. For a few minutes the hunter was stunned into a terrified silence. _

_His Master laid an almost fatherly hand on Dean's shoulder. Dean immediately tensed. His Master chuckled._

"_Such hostility." His Master said smoothly, "I remember a time when you were practically begging for my touch."_

_Dean's eyes darkened with such hatred which emulated his anger he felt towards Azazel. "Go to Hell, Alastair." He spat. "Leave me alone."_

_Alastair's touch tightened as he clawed Dean's shoulder. Dean winced. "I remember you used to worship me once Dean. I am your Master..."_

"_Not anymore." Dean growled. "I'm not your bitch anymore…Master…" he sneered the last word, it was laced with heavy sarcasm. Alastair growled._

"_You will eventually bow to me. I am still controlling you." The Master circled his student like a predator would his prey. "I mean, you do love being controlled. You were daddy's blunt little instrument. And now you're mine. You are weak Dean. You and I, we are much more connected than you think."_

_Dean swallowed as Alastair's fingers trailed up his arm in an almost gentle manner. Shivers cascaded down Dean's spine. "No. No, I am not taking orders from you. Get the fuck off me!" _

_Alastair withdrew his razor from his pocket. His eyes narrowed with disgust. He withdrew his touch from his student. "I guess you still have a backbone Dean. Maybe it's all those angels on your shoulder."_

_Dean's eyes widened for a moment. Curiosity getting the better of him. "Angels? You know about the angels?" _

_Alastair chuckled. "Of course, who else could have dragged you away from me?" Alastair's eyes darkened for a fraction of a second. Dean shivered as anger practically poured off the demon. He could almost see it._

_Dean gulped. So it was true._

"_But no matter, no matter. Things will soon be back the way they were." Alastair grinned as he displayed the flashing razor in front of Dean's face. Dean tugged desperately at the straps. No._

"_Like Hell they will. Wake up Dean." He chastised himself. "Wake up!" _

_Alastair laughed. It was a laugh which caused the hairs on the back of Dean's neck to stand on end. _

_Alastair waved his hand and Dean's shirt suddenly vanished. Leaving the hunter extremely vulnerable to the demon's razor. Alastair trailed the tip randomly over his student's chest. Drawing the thinnest line of blood, causing Dean to wince slightly. But this sting would be nothing in comparison to what Alastair could do…_

"_Okay. You got me." Dean said finally, "What do you want?" _

_Alastair chuckled. Removing the knife from Dean's trembling frame. "I want, you my boy. I want my Dean-o again."_

_Dean scoffed as Alastair grabbed his chin. Forcing the hunter to look directly into the demon's eyes. "I want my son again."_

"_I'm not your son Goddamit!" Dean shouted. "Now get the hell outta my head!"_

_Alastair chuckled. "I'll leave you now, Sammy's waking up. But just so we are clear." Alastair leaned in closer, so close that their noses were almost touching. Dean tried to look away, but Alastair held his chin in a vice-like grip. "We will never be over. When you said 'yes' in Hell, you didn't just say 'yes' to torturing souls, you said 'yes' to me, boy. We are bonded. Are souls are entwined. Why don't you do a little research on demon's Soul Partners and we'll have another little discussion. Oh, and just to warn you, Dean-o. You will start to experience…mmm…some small side-effects…."_

_Dean spat in his face. Alastair scowled. Withdrawing his hold from his student. "Now that wasn't very nice." He said cryptically, wiping Dean's spit from his cheek._

"_Like I said, go to Hell. Whatever crap you're selling, I ain't buying. I don't believe you. I would never agree to such a thing."_

"_Oh you will remember, son. And you will start to crave me sooner or later."_

"_Over my dead body. I'd rather be locked up in the panic room." Dean scowled as Alastair patted his shoulder and leaned close to his boy's ear._

"_Time to wake up."_

_The razor was then planted into Dean's gut. Dean screamed as blood drenched his abdomen. Alastair was laughing. _

And then Dean woke up screaming. And a concerned angel observed his charge, pressing two fingers to Dean's forehead, the screaming subsided and Dean's eyes closed.

"Be at peace, Dean Winchester." Castiel glanced towards Sam's empty bed. Where was the younger Winchester? He then looked down at Dean's unconscious form. He then frowned. Something wasn't right. He sniffed. And recoiled instantly. Demons. A demon was hunting Dean. Castiel growled. The Righteous Man had to be saved. He would destroy this demon. And save the broken Winchester. Dean had to be saved. Or the world would be lost in the fires of Armageddon.

**So what do you guys think? Very dark I know. Will Cas save the day and figure out Dean's connection with Alastair? You'll only find out if you read and review! Thanks guys! x**


	6. Chapter 6

**Hey guys! Decided to post another early chapter. Will post another one soon but only if you guys review, I feel starved of reviews recently.**

**I don't own anything.**

**Enjoy!**

Chapter 6

Dean's eyes snapped open.

No.

The hunter's hands trembled as he pushed his face off the table he had been leaning on. His right cheek was now blotchy but he couldn't care less about his appearance.

Dean ran a hand through his sweaty hair. He could still feel the pain from the knife wound. He could still feel the razor carving into his skin. He could still feel _his_ touch lingering on him. God he needed a shower. He needed to be rid of Alastair.

"Dean."

Dean almost jumped out of his skin as he saw the angel's meatsuit standing a foot away from him. Dean gritted his teeth in frustration. He didn't need to deal with this crap right now.

"Sorry Cas but now's not the time."

The angel frowned. "Cas?" He questioned, scratching his chin in confusion. "What's a Cas?"

Dean groaned. "Your new nickname, er, never mind."

Castiel simply stared at the hunter. Deadpanned. His face as expressionless as a doorknob.

"Well you are just full of humour, aren't you chuckles." Dean snorted, "Okay, what's cooking?"

"There is nothing 'cooking' as you put it, but I am concerned." Castiel's blue eyes seemed to stare straight through Dean. Dean swallowed nervously. That didn't sound good.

Dean stood up, stretching his limbs as he did so. "What've you gotta be concerned about? Oh yeah my so-called "mission" as Sammy put it, from the freaking Lord of this shit hole."

Castiel's eyes darkened. The temperature in the room felt like it dropped a few degrees. Dean gulped. Maybe he shouldn't piss this dude off…

"Do not say such blasphemy." Castiel warned, but then his expression softened. "I have come to save you Dean Winchester. I will save you from the demon that is hunting you."

Dean laughed. A hollow empty laugh, but a laugh nonetheless. It was a laugh that made Castiel feel extremely uncomfortable. "No demon is hunting me, dude. Oh, and for the record, next time you show up unannounced, give me a little heads up beforehand." Dean then ignored the angel completely and walked over to the bathroom, shutting the door behind him. Castiel frowned at the bathroom door. He would just have to wait until the Winchester had finished his… what did Uriel say humans called it? His… his business. The angel sighed. Today was going to be a long day. He could see that the Winchester was in denial. It was only a matter of time before…

"Who the hell are you?"

Castiel sighed again. Winchester number two had finally arrived. The angel glared at the barrel of the gun Sam was pointing straight at him.

"I am Castiel, an angel of the Lord."

Sam gaped at him. But did not lower his gun. "You're the angel that pulled Dean out of Hell?" he asked slowly.

"That would be correct." Castiel nodded. "But I am concerned your brother is hiding something from us. A demon is hunting him."

Sam's eyes widened in fear. He lowered the gun. "Hunting him? What demon? Why? I thought Lilith is no longer interested in Dean, why would she…?"

"I do not think that it is Lilith." Castiel mused whilst looking directly into Sam's concerned expression.

"Then who?" Sam asked nervously.

Castiel sighed. "I am not sure, but I could smell a demon on Dean just as I can smell the demon blood in your veins." Castiel narrowed his eyes, Sam gulped, a slight sweat began to form on his upper lip as the angel took a few steps towards the youngest Winchester.

"And just so we are clear, Samuel, you are treading a very thin line. Dean is my charge and therefore under my protection, however, I cannot say the same rules will apply to you. Stop what you are doing now before my superiors find out." Castiel's voice was low, so low it made the hairs on the back of Sam's neck stand on end.

Sam's mouth twitched. As though he wanted to say something nasty in reply but then thought better of it. The dude was a freaking angel after all.

"I just want to help Dean." The younger hunter insisted.

Castiel nodded. "Then we will be allies. For now."

"For now." Sam echoed.

* * *

Dean sighed as he stepped out of the shower, the cool air was a soothing remedy to Alastair's deceptive touch. Dean quickly dried himself off with a towel and shoved on his usual clothes, not forgetting his favourite jacket. But before he left the bathroom he glanced at his reflection in the mirror.

And he hated what he saw.

A nervous, pathetic, desperate man longing for a dreamless sleep. He could vividly see dark circles under his eyes. He then glanced down at his hands…he could almost imagine them coated in layers of blood like they were in…

He wanted to take another shower.

'_Remember boy. Never forget our paradise together, you were so happy down there.'_

Dean gripped the corners of the sink so tightly that his knuckles turned white… like Alastair's eyes. Dean shook his head in an attempt to shake all thoughts of his former Master from his mind and opened the bathroom door.

He tried to get a bear from the kitchen but he was prevented from walking more than a couple of steps from the bathroom as the hulking mass of his brother blocked his way to the fridge. Dean gasped as Sam grabbed his shoulders and shoved him against the wall, the attack was so sudden he had no chance to protect himself.

"Dude!" He shouted, "What the actual hell?!"

"Why Dean?" Sam growled, "Why didn't you tell me you are being hunted?"

Dean scoffed, glaring at his brother with such hate Sam let go of him in shock. Dean straightened up, eyeing his brother coolly. "I am not being hunted man, why would you think…" Dean's eyes flickered towards the kitchen where Cas was standing, staring at the brothers blankly. "Son of a bitch." Dean growled. He marched up to the angel, pointing an accusatory finger at the angelic creature.

"You have got no right to get my little brother worried over some damn lie!" Dean yelled. Castiel simply stared at him. His face as expressionless as a chalk board.

"I do not lie." Castiel said calmly, "I smell demon on you."

"Bull." Dean said fiercely, "Now tell us what you wanted to say at the beginning right now or get the hell outta our room."

Castiel sighed. His superiors had asked him to remain allies with Dean Winchester. It would therefore not be prudent to search through the man's memories without his approval. Maybe another time… he should probably ask Uriel for guidance. Castiel sighed deeply once more before saying. "Lilith is breaking the sixty six seals…"

"_So_." Dean said, frustration evident in his voice, "What does that have to do with us?"

Castiel glanced across at Sam, and then his piercing blue eyes stared intently at Dean, as though his gaze could see right through the hunter. Dean swallowed nervously. "Everything." Castiel declared. "I raised you from perdition, Dean. It is your job to stop Lilith from breaking these seals, as well as ours."

"Uh huh." Dean snorted, "Can't I just be left alone for five freaking minutes!" Dean slammed his hand against the wall in anger. Castiel immediately stiffened, and as quick as a flash the angel was only a foot away from the Winchester, his eyes glaring into Dean's green ones.

"Show me some respect." Castiel's low voice caused Dean to tremble slightly, for a second, only for a split second, Castiel's dominance reminded him of Alastair. Dean gulped as Castiel continued, "I was the one who pulled you out of hell. I can throw you back in."

Dean nodded sharply, exhaling with relief as Castiel took a few paces back. "She will strike again soon. I'll be in contact when I know where."

"What happens if Lilith breaks all of the seals?" Sam asked curiously.

Castiel's gaze narrowed as he turned to study the younger Winchester. "Your friend Bobby may know the answer to that." And with a rustle of wings, the angel was gone, just like the wind.

"Son of a bitch." Dean growled through gritted teeth.

"You could say that again." Sam said as he reached into his pocket and pulled out his phone.

"What are you doing?"

"Calling Bobby, got to start somewhere right?" Sam replied.

"Let's just drive round to Bobby's, it's time I took a drive in my baby. I miss just taking a drive. Simplicity in it, you know." Dean flashed his brother an awkward grin, "She's probably starved of all my attention."

"Don't flatter yourself too much Dean, here, you'll need these." Sam chucked his brother the keys.

Dean was about to head out of the room when he frowned… how did Sam have the keys in the first place… he had put the keys next to his bed…

"Dude, why do you have the keys?" Dean asked cautiously, trying to spot any faults in Sam's remarkable poker face. His brother shrugged.

"Like you said, I wanted to take a drive." Sam answered cryptically, grabbing his duffel bag he opened the door. "You coming?"

Dean quickly scanned the room to see if they had left any valuables. Nada. "Yeah sure I'll catch you up." He called.

Sam shrugged and left, but as he did so, Dean couldn't help but feel that there was something not quite right about Sam. His baby brother had definitely changed. What exactly happened during the past four months whilst he was in Hell?

**I'll give you a clue. One word happened. And she's a demon! Oops…spoilers. :P Hope you guys liked it. As usually please review and then the next chappie will come sooner. Thanks everyone! x**


	7. Chapter 7

**First of all, I am so sorry it's taken me sooo long to update. Revision has been a nightmare! Thanks to those of you have reviewed and favourite, but I would really like more reviews as I am really busy and only if I get more reviews I will write more. **

**Nothing belongs to me…duh!**

**Also, just want to say, I'm not a football fan as much but I've been staying up in Liverpool for the past few weeks as my grandparents are Liverpudlians. RIP Hillsborough 96. Never Walk Alone!**

* * *

Chapter 7

Bobby's look said it all.

Fear.

It was as though their adopted father was paralysed with it. Sam and Dean shared an anxious glance before Sam nudged Bobby out of some kind of paralysis.

"What?" Bobby mumbled.

"The sixty six seals?" Sam asked, "What do they mean? Cas said you would know."

Bobby frowned, "I don't particularly like this Cas character you are speaking of. I mean, what's his deal, him showing up and thinking he can boss us around like chess pieces?"

"Finally, someone who agrees with me! Dude up high!" Dean grinned, but his high-five, or should I say, attempt at a high five, was ultimately rejected by a cranky Bobby.

"Well." Sam coughed in an attempt to cover up his brother's foolish behaviour. "He is a freaking angel of the Lord."

"Oh so now God comes calling." Bobby growled, "Where was he when my…" and as though realising he was about to say something that shouldn't be said, Bobby stared at the Winchester brothers, wide-eyed, before turning his attention back to the book he had been reading.

Dean raised his eyebrow, not saying a word. Bobby was keeping secrets too now. Was there anyone in his life that didn't keep secrets from him? Then again, the secrets he kept from everyone… Dean gulped… they would scare the living daylights out of them…

Dean nodded in understanding. All humour had vanished from his expression, as though a dark veil had descended over the hunter. "Yeah God's a douche that's what!"

"Dean!" Sam warned, "The guy pulled you out of Hell. That hasn't happened to anyone before, ever, except his own _son_."

"What so I'm son freaking Jesus!" Dean almost laughed at the thought, "Dude, I steal credit cards, I cheat on women and I'm pretty sure I've committed gluttony every single day. Why would God single me out?"

"Well." Sam said, "This is good isn't it? It's not just some demon crap, Dean, the good guys could finally be helping us!"

"Will you two pipe down, do you wanna know what them seals are or not, cos I ain't got all day?!" Bobby yelled, causing the two brothers to pause their not-so-small discussion.

"Please, do tell." Dean smirked at Sam as he sat down in front of Bobby. "But first of all I still don't believe this freaking dude is an angel. Now he may seem convincing at times, with the freaking wings and shit, but I'm telling you it's a freaking demon trying to catch me off guard."

"But Dean the things more powerful than Lilith, what demon could possibly-"

"Will you just shut your mouths!" Bobby snapped, "And read."

Dean glanced down at the book in Bobby's hands. And his heart sank like a stone as he glossed over the text. Bobby smiled grimly.

"An angel of the Lord whatsit is the only possible supernatural thing which could pull your ass outta Hell boy. Not only that, the Sixty Seals signify the arrival of the Apocalypse."

"Th…the what now?" Dean questioned, his pulse quickened as fear gripped his heart.

"The end of the world, four horsemen, Lucifer and the whole shebang." Bobby said quietly.

Sam gulped. "As in the end. End?"

Bobby stared at the hunter intently, nodding solemly. "The end of the world as we know it, kiddo."

Dean groaned. "Oh crap. So they'll be no more pie?"

Sam and Bobby both glared at the elder Winchester. Dean raised his arms defensively. "What? That'll kill me."

* * *

Oh man, Dean thought, if I ever see another stupid book on these angels, I'm gonna chuck it in the fire and I'll take Bobby's anger like a man. Dean sighed as he looked at himself in the mirror. Dark bags haunted his eyes like dark crescents. So he was on the side of the angels… he should be feeling happy but… Dean closed his eyes in defeat…that basically meant that everything Alastair said was true.

'_You're nothing but their puppet, boy. Come to me, I'll be there for you…'_

Dean growled in rage as he heard the sick voice of his Master deep within the dark crevices of his mind.

_Shut up. Shut up! SHUT UP! _Dean yelled inside his head.

He hated feeling this trapped. He hated how Sam was so pleased about these stupid angels. If they were real wouldn't they have prevented his mother's death? Why was everything so fucked up?

'_I'll make it better.'_

_Get out of my head! _Dean shouted at the Alastair in his mind. He felt a rush of adrenaline as all of his anger, all of his suppressed rage and fear poured out of his soul like an avalanche of rock crumbling down the side of a volcano about to explode. It was as though his soul was trying to break Alastair's suffocating hold. A final plea to anyone out there to save him. But Alastair's mental grip deepened and Dean suddenly whimpered as a searing pain shot through his mind, as though his cells were on fire. Dean clutched his temples in agony, swearing at the source of his pain, Alastair. Dean glanced into the mirror and gasped. Was he hallucinating? Or was he just going crazy. But he could see the demonic form of his Master grinning like a shark in the mighty fires of Hell. It was as though he was looking through the veil of death, staring into the jaws of Hell. For most humans, this sight would kill a man. But Dean had been there, he had witnessed Alastair's true form, the horrendous razor talons and a face so twisted that it would scare the living daylights out of any serial killer. Dean couldn't help it though. He screamed. It was as though Hell wanted him back and he fell to the tiled floor with a sickening thud.

"Dean!"

He could hear Sammy's shout in the distance. But it was muffled, as though his head was wrapped in cotton wool. He heard banging on the bathroom door.

"Go. The Righteous Man belongs to Heaven. Leave him!" A fierce voice commanded from above.

Castiel.

Dean then welcomed the darkness that swallowed him.

* * *

**So… yeah a lot of angst but I haven't updated this story in a while so I'm kinda going with the flow here, don't really have a plan but if you guys review I'll try to update quicker but I'm gonna warn you in advance, my exams are steadily approaching and unfortunately in the real world that takes priority. Anyways, thanks for reading as always and review! Cos if you review I'll make time to update! xx**


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